Erika Meitner
my inaccessible heart

my inaccessible heart: the closer you come, the more beautiful it seems

 

my inaccessible heart is a carolina wren nesting deep in the leaves crushed up against my studio to avoid the snow, her intermittent rustling

 

my inaccessible heart breaks into the presence of the spaces we dwell in? vacate?

 

my inaccessible heart is a white shark hotspot—a dangerous but integral part of the aquatic ecosystem

 

my inaccessible heart is simultaneously a fetish object and demonized as an instrument of reason

 

my inaccessible heart is a fleshlight: a life-like sculpture of my cunt going for $59.95 online

 

my inaccessible heart is all like, adapt or die

 

my inaccessible heart is the mesh steel net newly installed under the Golden Gate Bridge to prevent suicides; it’s not soft; it’s not rubber; it doesn’t stretch; it’s like jumping into a cheese grater, says the general manager of the bridge district on NPR

 

“We clamor for the right to opacity for everyone,” writes Glissant about my inaccessible heart

 

my inaccessible heart is Rachmaninoff on a train from Knoxville after his last recital as a pianist, with his sclerosis, lumbago, neuralgia, high blood pressure, and aggressive melanoma

 

the atria of my inaccessible heart are featured in Design Milk and clad in minimalist veined Carrara marble

 

what is organized internally by a set of curving walls? my inaccessible heart

 

my inaccessible heart is an American lotus pod washed up on the shores of Lake Erie, dried brown and filled with holes, seeds rattling around in their shriveled hollow

 

my inaccessible heart reminds me that the most effective bonds between people are temporal— something about daily rituals

 

my inaccessible heart is that episode of Star Trek where Kirk orders the Enterprise’s shields extended around another spacecraft to protect it from an asteroid field, which severely strains its systems and destroys all but one of the lithium crystal circuits in the ship’s warp engines

 

the chambers of my inaccessible heart carry evidence of archaeological inhabitants

 

an unraveled cassette tape plays the Top 40 songs of my inaccessible heart

 

how many ways can you disappear my inaccessible heart?

 

my inaccessible heart is a machine littered with shards of successive dreams so richly configured that it can easily be claimed by your imagination

 

in summer, my inaccessible heart is redolent of ripe tomatoes on the vine warmed by the sun

 

my inaccessible heart has met all requirements for squatters’ rights—has occupied my body for almost fifty years with open and notorious, exclusive, hostile, continuous and uninterrupted possession

 

I am raising the rent on my inaccessible heart

 

There is nothing inherently wrong with my inaccessible heart—it has its own integrity, and its practical advantages are beyond dispute

 
Found In Volume 54, No. 03
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Erika Meitner
About the Author
Erika Meitner is the author of six books of poems, including Ideal Cities (HarperCollins, 2010), which was a 2009 National Poetry series winner; Copia (BOA Editions, 2014); Holy Moly Carry Me (BOA Editions, 2018), which won the 2018 National Jewish Book Award in Poetry, and was a finalist for the Library of Virginia Award and the National Book Critics Circle Award in poetry; and Useful Junk (BOA Editions, 2022), which was a finalist for the Wisconsin Library Association Literary Award in poetry. Her newest book, Assembled Audience, is due out from Milkweed Editions in 2026.